I really wanted to spread the word about this project. From Jezebel.com:
Prominent third-wave feminist activist and writer Jennifer Baumgardner made a splash three years ago when she distributed a controversial t-shirt that had, writ large on the front: “I Had An Abortion,…” Baumgardner is making headlines again today with a new tee, one that says “raped” on it. The letters are smaller this time — it’s a pale pink shirt with an illustration of a safe, and inside the safe is a note emblazoned with the words “I was raped” — but the spirit of provocation remains the same.
As is to be expected the reaction to this T is mixed. Some see it as an empowering way to raise awareness around how common sexual assault is. Other people don’t.
Here’s why the creator thinks wearing a shirt like this is important:
Why wear a shirt that says “I Was Raped”?Because wearing it lets others know that they aren’t alone.
Because wearing it invites conversation about a silenced experience that so many women and men share.
Because rape is a crime that someone did to you, against your will.
Because, as Maya Angelou says, “I can be changed by what happens to me, but I refuse to be reduced by it.”
Because you shouldn’t be ashamed that you were raped; the perpetrator should be ashamed.
Because being public shatters the very silence that enables rape to be so common.
Because naming what has happened is the first step toward changing the reality of rape.
Because legal redress is rarely served, so it’s crucial to find our own justice and acknowledgment.
~ Jennifer Baumgardner, “I Was Raped” project, 2008
“By having an object like this,” Baumgardner told the New York Times, “that’s so mundane, it sort of forces [rape] into everyday conversation.”
What do you think?
If you’re interested in buying the t-shirt and supporting the awesome “sex ed for the real world” Scarleteen while you do so, click here.
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eight comments
Wow. That's pretty fascinating.
A few years ago I almost bought a t-shirt that said "I will NOT love you long time." I decided against it because in the end I figured the comments I would get about the t-shirt would outweigh the positive feeling that would come with wearing it.
I wonder the same thing - to a much greater degree! - with this t-shirt, would people simply get harassed and shamed by people who didn't support/appreciate what this project is trying to do? I guess the Scarleteen article touches on this a little.
Posted by Thea
April 4, 2008, 6:22 PM
I fear that someone who hasn't been raped will wear this shirt for "fun" or "irony."
If rape vitims wore shirts that screamed in block letters "I WAS RAPED", I think it would give the impression that they were proud of being raped. People tend to wear shirts with messages because they endorse or believe in those messages or want to show themselves off through those messages. But the way the message is presented in this particular t-shirt is powerful, and it makes you pause and feel uncomfortable (in a way you should, to get you thinking about it).
Posted by Jelly
April 4, 2008, 7:52 PM
MY reaction to seeing someone wearing this tee would be. . " So Was I ".
There will of course be those who will have issue with the message this tee displays as you can never please everyone, but I think it breaks the silence! For me, it's been over 10 years and only a handful of people know about it (not even my family). When it happened to me, many still had the mindset of placing instant blame on the woman . .like she did something to deserve it. I received very little support, almost none. Instead the reaction was very negative which lead me to keep this secret to myself for a VERY long time.
Only in the past year or so when I've shared my secret have I finally felt the support I so longed for years ago. When rape happens to you, its something that you will live with forever. It does not go away, but living with it does get better. I refused to let it define me or set the tone for my life and I'm a stronger woman for that.
I applaud the women who do have and will have the strength to break the silence.
Posted by Ania
April 7, 2008, 3:49 PM
My first reaction is that, while this is well intentioned, it'll be read the wrond way. If I saw this in a vacuum I'd be terribly offended. Does it make rape a fashion statement like was attempted years ago with the "just raped" look that some big-shot designer put on the runway? Does the immage of the safe evoke the idea that besides being violated somethings fundamental has been forever taken and that rape victims are somehow pitifully bankrupt of their virginity? Anyway, doesn't wear this shirt take the power away from the individual in term of deciding when, how and with whom such sensitive issues are discussed? There's still too much fetichising of rape for this to be okay in my mind. What about a shirt that says "I have the right to kill a rapist" or " "One in three was hurt like me." or something more universal like "fighting the war against women." I have a sudden yen to make t-shirts.
Posted by Myra
April 7, 2008, 9:52 PM
This is outrageous.
You know what's a better idea? Making shirts that say "_______ is a rapist" and we can each fill in our own blanks and wear those around.
Posted by Erin
April 10, 2008, 8:52 AM
Ok. Here is an attempt at a more articulate response, but my blood is still boiling.
If the medium is the message, I can’t even wrap my head around a shirt-sized “raped” label really says.
I can relate to how good (and heartbreaking) it feels to connect with other women who understand what you’re going through. These moments have been the safest and most actively healing times for me, and took a lot of time and trust to develop. They didn’t occur in the line at Second Cup or while going up an escalator. If I see someone wearing this shirt, should I give her a high-fives on the subway and ask “So, did he go to jail?” or “How are the flashbacks?”
“I was raped,” in the dreaded passive voice, sounds like something that happened by chance, like “I have brown hair.” It erases the fact that a living, breathing, human being make a conscious choice to violate your body.
Myra suggests a shirt that says an alarming fact, like “1 in 3 women are raped.” Sure, it’s an important point, but we hear these stats all the time. I say a better step to reducing the problem is to remember that where there is smoke, there is fire: For once I’d love to read speculation on how many men are rapists. Does 1 in 3 men force himself on someone? Fiddle with children? Think it’s okay to grope someone who is drunk?
I’ve told lots of people what happened to me, but I never mention names. Why do we have this social instinct to protect the bad guys? So yeah, why not a shirt that “outs” the rapists by name? Then if someone has any questions, they can all the rapist up directly and ask all about it.
Sexual abuse is a deep, intimate and layered experience. I think broadcasting it on a t-shirt is a flippant and shocking gesture. If I saw you wearing this, (which I can’t imagine I ever will, since this isn’t likely to be a hot trend any time soon) I would have a panic attack. I can’t imagine what kind of productive or healing discussion would ever come of it. Making people uncomfortable is a cheap way to deal with a serious problem.
Posted by Erin
April 10, 2008, 10:04 AM
Erin - you make an interesting point about whether wearing a shirt like this is responsible, on the basis on how other women who've experienced assualt might feel when they see it.
Re: how many men have raped women - I've often worried about the same thing myself. The stats would seem to indicate that I must have at least one male friend (relative, co-worker...) in my life who has assaulted someone. It's true that we rarely look at the stats from the other side, ie question how many men we know who've raped someone, or try to understand what effect having raped someone has on men's future relationships with women and community.
Posted by Thea
April 10, 2008, 10:44 AM
The "I had an abortion" t-shirts seem to work better because they say "I had one, and it's no big deal, so I can put it on a t-shirt. Deal." I like that. I'm not saying that abortion is not an important and sometimes life-changing decision in a woman's life, but it can often be positive and necessary. A t-shirt that states that it happened and it's nothing to be ashamed of is awesome.
The t-shirt doesn't work as well for rape because rape is not positive and necessary. It's not something that we need to get more comfortable with - rape should always make us outraged. But I don't think that doesn't mean it CAN work in some contexts. When I initially saw this shirt my first instinct was to buy and wear one because I liked the idea of making the general public face something that makes them uncomfortable, and I liked the idea of unifying with other women (1 in 3 I pass on the street.)
But after hearing these responses I'm no longer sure.
"I’ve told lots of people what happened to me, but I never mention names. Why do we have this social instinct to protect the bad guys?"
This is an amazing point. I have been open about prior incidents of sexual assault in a variety of publications, but I have always gone out of my way protect the guilty. Why is that?
Posted by Stacey May
April 10, 2008, 10:53 AM
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